Coercion and Liberation

Coercion often comes from external forces, pushing individuals to think or act in ways they deeply resent. Under such pressure, people cannot align with their true selves. Thoughts formed under coercion are not authentic, as they stem from fear—fear of rejection or punishment, leading them to conform to an imposed mindset while secretly holding another.

Actions taken under coercion often come with resistance. In some cases, individuals may even sabotage their work, make mistakes, or find ways to disrupt the task at hand.

However, in reality, most coercion originates from within rather than external forces. The most powerful coercion comes from the fear of exclusion from an important group. To maintain belonging, individuals may go to great lengths, acting as though forced, even when the pressure is self-imposed.

This fear becomes deeply internalized, allowing coercion to take root alongside it. The feeling of 'fear of coercion' and the sense of 'already being coerced' often have little to do with actual circumstances. Instead, they stem primarily from one’s internal mental impressions, which sustain and perpetuate both fear and the experience of being forced. People often justify this by saying, 'That’s how things really happened in the past.' But in truth, what remains is merely an imprint of past events in the mind.

How can we break free from these fears and the accompanying sense of internal coercion? We turn inward, deeply connecting with ourselves, allowing whatever arises within us to simply be. Whenever something in the present unsettles or pressures us, we compare our perception of the external situation with our pre-existing inner impressions. A simpler approach is to first acknowledge our inner impressions, then shift our attention to those around us in the present. From there, we allow ourselves to adopt a new perspective—perhaps one rooted in goodwill. We then observe how this shift changes us, how it affects others, all while remaining centered. By doing so, we prevent others from imprinting their perceptions onto us, just as we refrain from imposing our own onto them. This enables us to fully engage with reality as it is, compelling others to do the same, staying grounded in the present moment.

When we let go of the need for an outcome to be better than necessary, we free ourselves and others. Suddenly, coercion and fear disappear. This shift compels others to focus on the collective effort itself, without excessive demands or unrealistic expectations. In reality, such expectations do not contribute to the project's growth; rather, they become obstacles.

Suddenly, both the other person and I feel liberated—there is no more fear or coercion. I am free to think in my own way because I keep my thoughts to myself, without concern for what others think. In this state, I remain centered, and so do they. There is no need for me to fear them, nor for them to fear me. As a result, neither of us exerts pressure on the other.

The best way to overcome such fears and pressure is through clear, loving thoughts. True love always comes with clarity and detachment—honoring others as separate individuals and respecting both their lives and our own. When we stop making assumptions and imposing expectations, we free ourselves from unnecessary constraints, allowing us to live with ease.

Extracted from “Farewell Jesus” by Bert Hellinger